U Can't Touch This?

Growing up, there were few groups that I heard more of emanating from my mom and dad's record player/tape deck/stereo than Hall & Oates.  The duo had a string of pop hits starting in the 80's and continuing until the latter part of the decade.  Each of the members of the duo embarked on solo careers to varying degrees of success.  Nonetheless, one of my favorite songs for many years was "Out of Touch."  You have heard it countless times, I am sure.  

"Out Of Touch"

Shake it up is all that we know
Using the bodies up as we go
I'm waking up to fantasy
The shades all around
Aren't the colors we used to see
Broken ice still melts in the sun
And times that are broken
Can often be one again
We're soul alone
And soul really matters to me
Take a look around

You're out of touch
I'm out of time (time)
But I'm out of my head
When you're not around
You're out of touch
I'm out of time (time)
But I'm out of my head
When you're not around
Oh, oh-oh, oh
Oh, oh-oh, oh

Reaching out for something to hold
Looking for a love
Where the climate is cold
Manic moves and drowsy dreams
Or living in the middle
Between the two extremes
Smoking guns hot to the touch
Would cool down
If we didn't use them so much
We're soul alone
And soul really matters to me
Too much

You're out of touch
I'm out of time (time)
But I'm out of my head
When you're not around
You're out of touch
I'm out of time (time)
But I'm out of my head
When you're not around
Oh, oh-oh, oh
Oh, oh-oh, oh...

(Out of touch)
Out of touch

You're out of touch
I'm out of time (time)
But I'm out of my head
When you're not around
You're out of touch
I'm out of time (time)
But I'm out of my head
When you're not around..

Written by Darryl Hall and John Oates

Yes yes, I understand this song is about two people who fell into and then out of love, and that they are apart from each other by choice.  This blog is not about divorce or other relationship-type issues within the law, its about estate planning and elder law!   Where is the connection here?  Its a good one.  Do you have someone important who is "out of touch" with you and other important people in their lives?  

Whatever the reason may be, we might have a person in our lives who is important to us, who is not in regular contact with us.  Lets say you moved across the country from California to Delaware, and your mom is left behind in California.  She is getting up there in age, and she doesnt have too many friends where she is.  

So you see her when you can, like during the holidays, maybe Christmas only, and you call her every couple weeks.  At some point, she doesnt call, and you cannot reach her on the phone.  You dont think anything of it for a few days, and then you start to wonder:  maybe she fell?  Or maybe she was hospitalized?  Or something else happened??  Then you get the call that she decided to go to Hawaii on vacation for a few days because she got a good airfare.

You feel relieved, but then you wonder what would happen, how long would your mom be stuck in a ditch somewhere, with her car, or marooned in an airport, or in a hospital.  Or worse.  And then you think--you dont know who her neighbors are, and you surely dont know her friends phone numbers out there in California.  Well.  This is a pretty scary feeling! 

Lets look at some legal ramifications of being "out of touch".  If something happens to a loved one and they dont have a medical power of attorney, watch out!  If they get into an accident and immediate medical attention is needed, who can help the doctors figure out what to do, or what is against the wishes of your loved one?  What if your "out of touch" loved one has kids, and they need to be picked up from daycare everyday?  Who can pick them up and take care of them until someone with legal responsibility can get there?

The list of possibilities is nearly endless.  If there is someone who may have you listed as a POA, but your situation has changed and you no longer can serve in this capacity, have you told them such?  If you might be a beneficiary or executor on a will, and the person who wrote the will moves-- is everything you need to know/do still the same in that new state, or are you in for a bad surprise, because they were "out of touch"?  

I think you get the picture.   Life is too short to be out of touch with someone who you may be legally tied to via will or other important document.  Give your loved one, or that long lost friend a call today.  Get back in touch.  :-)